That's in India. And, I am not even sure that's the correct count. These are the people who live by the railroad tracks, under bridges in shacks made of whatever they can find. These are the people who have kids by the dozens, most of whom probably die before reaching a decent age. These are the folks who will never see 3 square meals a day, forget about the proper number of calories and gms of nutrients. So, when this is the true case of almost 300 million people in India, why did so many of my Indian friends not like the movie that showed that honest truth to the world?
Most of the things I have heard are complaints about the movie focusing on the negative images of India. My response is they were true images; nothing was fabricated. That is one side of India. To see the other glamorous, Levi's wearing, Honda driving, Pizza Hut eating side, I can watch any other movie Bollywood puts out. And, then I can also see them singing and dancing in Switzerland suddenly after a scene in a village in Punjab. Where's the reality there? I don't watch movies like Water, Provoked or Slumdog Millionaire to be enchanted by the glitter of Bollywood. And I know 2 of those 3 movies weren't even made in India/by an Indian. But, they are about issues as real to India and Indians as the fact that I noticed a grey hair on my head last weekend.
The awards that the movie won were justified. It competed against other similar and non-similar works of fiction. Whereas it might not be compared to Batman, it can be compared to The Reader which had a background of Nazi Germany. I haven't noticed it yet, but maybe some Germans out there are unhappy about that being showcased at the Oscars as well. I think the awards it won and was nominated for were the ones it deserved. It was obviously not nominated for best actor or actress because that wasn't the strongest point. No one individual in the movie was the best or worst. They all came together to show us the real India and the struggles of a population that is otherwise never really shown, not in all honesty, not in it's naked true glory! Ad, we still had the happy Bollywood ending. Boy gets girl, boy gets money, evil hoodlum dies.
In the end, I'd like to ask my friends, why is it so bad to show the rest of the world the ugly side of our country? Would we rather lie to them andhave them be shocked if they ever came to visit? Or, would we rather lay it out for everyone to see and maybe force some change to happen inside us and inside our nation? This question goes beyond the poverty issues, it goes to women's issues, it goes to religious issues, it goes to mental health issues, it goes to any existing issue that people would rather hide away than face it head on.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Monday, February 02, 2009
Gastric Bypass - the myth and the reality
This post has been a long time coming. It should have been writtenw hen I first made the decision to get this surgery and had people commenting anonymously about it beign the easy way out and the repurcussions etc. And, now, people are saying things like "I think people who get gastric bypass are taking the easy way out. I understand why people do it but I have a really hard time respecting their results. It's not like I look at them and think, "Wow, you worked SO HARD to get that skinny."" Well, time to set the record straight. And, don't bother commenting that that wasn't aimed at me. It was aimed at everybody who's had gastric bypass and that includes me.
1. You don't get "skinny" automatically with gastric bypass. Most people lose 50-70% of their excess body weight within a year and then it's up to the person. Which measn that somebody with a BMI of over 40 (which I was) can get down from severely obese to maybe the upper end of overweight within a year. Which means I am still fighting with 40-50 lbs of fat, which is more for people who go in with more excess weight. I was maybe at the lower end of the weight spectrum of the people I saw at my doctor's office.
2. The 1st year of weight loss, which might seem seamless and easy to most people is anything but. Somebody who's dieting and excercising can cheat and eat some chocolate or drink a shake and go through a guilt trip later. Somebody who's had gastric bypass has a piece of chocolate or a nice thick shake and they get chills, sweats, nausea, debilitating cramps sometimes. I would say it's harder after having had gastric bypass because I have to consciously think of every morsel and every sip that gets past my lips. Because I can't just say to myself, "oh, I had this piece of dessert, I guess I'll run an extra half mile in the morning or do 20 more crunches." Because sometimes that extra morsel or sip could land me back in the hospital. I also have to go to the gym, unless I wan't excess skin jsut hanging off my ass, arms and legs. The initial weight loss is too fast for the body's skin to keep up with. So, the gym it was, 2-3 times a week, with a trainer, so I can be sure I am doing the right things for myself.
3. Past the first year, now I am only at BMI 29.9. Yay, not obese anymore. But, the work's not done yet. I go to the gym 3-5 times a week. I run, do strength training, weight lifting, swim, whatever I can. Because if I don't, I don't lose weight. Worse still, I have heard stories of people who regain after this surgery. I am still fat. I need to work harder now to lose the rest of it.
4. Beyond the constant care of what we're eating and drinking, then there are the health issues. I take multivitamins, iron, calcium citrate and protein supplements daily. I get a Vitamin B12 shot monthly. I'll do this for the rest of my life. And yes, that was my decision. But, don't you dare tell me it was an easy decision.
So, yes, made a decision that to some people, might seem like the easy way out. But, it wasn't. It just gave me a tool to use for the rest of my life. It gave me a starting point that I could work with. Maybe I could have done it without the surgery. But, a whole six months of supervised diet, excercise and prescription medicines under my primary care physician didn't help. Actually, a whole 8 years of yo-yoing despite gyms, personal trainers, what diet can you name that I didn't try ... and I was ready for something drastic. And, I wasn't willing to lose more of my life and time to fat. To failing some more. To being depressed any longer.
Gastric Bypass has yet to make somebody "skinny" without effort. To be skinny even now after the surgery, I am going to have to work harder than ever in my life. So, do some research and get your facts straight. If, after that, your views don't sway even a bit, well I guess everybody's entitled to their blind prejudices.
1. You don't get "skinny" automatically with gastric bypass. Most people lose 50-70% of their excess body weight within a year and then it's up to the person. Which measn that somebody with a BMI of over 40 (which I was) can get down from severely obese to maybe the upper end of overweight within a year. Which means I am still fighting with 40-50 lbs of fat, which is more for people who go in with more excess weight. I was maybe at the lower end of the weight spectrum of the people I saw at my doctor's office.
2. The 1st year of weight loss, which might seem seamless and easy to most people is anything but. Somebody who's dieting and excercising can cheat and eat some chocolate or drink a shake and go through a guilt trip later. Somebody who's had gastric bypass has a piece of chocolate or a nice thick shake and they get chills, sweats, nausea, debilitating cramps sometimes. I would say it's harder after having had gastric bypass because I have to consciously think of every morsel and every sip that gets past my lips. Because I can't just say to myself, "oh, I had this piece of dessert, I guess I'll run an extra half mile in the morning or do 20 more crunches." Because sometimes that extra morsel or sip could land me back in the hospital. I also have to go to the gym, unless I wan't excess skin jsut hanging off my ass, arms and legs. The initial weight loss is too fast for the body's skin to keep up with. So, the gym it was, 2-3 times a week, with a trainer, so I can be sure I am doing the right things for myself.
3. Past the first year, now I am only at BMI 29.9. Yay, not obese anymore. But, the work's not done yet. I go to the gym 3-5 times a week. I run, do strength training, weight lifting, swim, whatever I can. Because if I don't, I don't lose weight. Worse still, I have heard stories of people who regain after this surgery. I am still fat. I need to work harder now to lose the rest of it.
4. Beyond the constant care of what we're eating and drinking, then there are the health issues. I take multivitamins, iron, calcium citrate and protein supplements daily. I get a Vitamin B12 shot monthly. I'll do this for the rest of my life. And yes, that was my decision. But, don't you dare tell me it was an easy decision.
So, yes, made a decision that to some people, might seem like the easy way out. But, it wasn't. It just gave me a tool to use for the rest of my life. It gave me a starting point that I could work with. Maybe I could have done it without the surgery. But, a whole six months of supervised diet, excercise and prescription medicines under my primary care physician didn't help. Actually, a whole 8 years of yo-yoing despite gyms, personal trainers, what diet can you name that I didn't try ... and I was ready for something drastic. And, I wasn't willing to lose more of my life and time to fat. To failing some more. To being depressed any longer.
Gastric Bypass has yet to make somebody "skinny" without effort. To be skinny even now after the surgery, I am going to have to work harder than ever in my life. So, do some research and get your facts straight. If, after that, your views don't sway even a bit, well I guess everybody's entitled to their blind prejudices.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
So much to say, so little time
We just got back from Key West and Cozumel Mexico (4 day Cruise from Miami) and then 2 days at Miami Beach last Sunday. 372 photos and some videos of parasailing but I have been too tired to do anything with them. I promise to have them up by the end of this week.
Today's my first day of in-class class. I am signed up for 3, 2 of which are online. This will be my first in-class class since I graduated from grad school in 2006. I had a mixed experience with my online classes last semester. One worked out very well, the teacher and TA were both awesome and I ended up with an A. Second one, the teacher went missing for 7 weeks and I got a B. No feedback on assignments = no motivation to do assignments, you know? We'll see how this semester goes, especially with 3 classes.
And, I really want my part time job at Bed, Bath and Beyond back. Not just for the discounts. Really, the $5 off $15 coupons they send out are better than the employee discount. The extra money was good too. But, having never worked in retail, I enjoyed the experience. Since it wasn't my full time job, I could take the daily weird happenings and just enjoy them. I also made some really good friends. It's totally different from my day job and a place where my brain was really only working at 50% capacity. Felt good to just do something physical after spending all day sitting at a computer, thinking. (Really, I don't think all day at work but hope you understand).
I also want to keep volunteering with Neighbor Ride. It has been an awesome experience and a humbling one. I complain a lot about our lack of finances and opportunities to do things we'd like to do. But, after you've talked with somebody who has to chose between groceries for the week or seizure medication for their daughter, my situation didn't seem that bad. It also feels really good to be able to do something as small as giving somebody a ride to their church but know that that small action makes a huge difference in their lives.
I also need to get my exercise routine jumping. I was going 2-3 times a week before the Christmas holidays. Then, we were getting ready for the cruise, then we went on the cruise and this week I am sick. Result: haven't gone to the gym in a month. I have lost about 65% of my excess body weight, which has culminated in some loosey goosey skin around the tummy and hips (awesome mental picture, ain't it?). The doctor has talked about going in and fixing that but he doesn't want to do it till I have reached the 70% excess body weight loss since that's the number most people keep off for the rest of their lives. I am still losing weight, but at the rate of 1/2-1 lb a month. If I want to reach my goal, I need to ramp that up to 5 lbs a month. Which means I might need to start running. Like walking very fast, like both feet off the ground at the same time, like sweating and heart rate up and body fat melting (mmm another awesome mental image).
I also would like time with my husband, dog and sister and not go days without seeing or eating a meal with them. Don't really have to explain that one, do I?
Now, if you read all that and are asking yourself if my particular world has more than 24 hours in a day, don't worry. That's the same question I've asked myself. I do thrive when things are hectic and my plate's more than just full. I got the best grades in school when I was taking classes at both a community college and a state university and working at both places too. But, I wasn't married. So much to do, so little time. I wish there were some things I could do while sleeping - showering, eating breakfast, getting ready for work etc. Sleeping, I feel, is a giant waste of time, so if I could at least multi-task while sleeping, it would make things easier. Or, if we could come up with a rejuvenation pod where you cna take a power nap for an hour or so and get out feeling like you had a 6-8 hr sleep, now that would be a worthwhile invention.
Since I can do neither of those, I have to look at everything I WANT to do, figure out what I NEED to do and cut out some things from my schedule. Sucky.
Today's my first day of in-class class. I am signed up for 3, 2 of which are online. This will be my first in-class class since I graduated from grad school in 2006. I had a mixed experience with my online classes last semester. One worked out very well, the teacher and TA were both awesome and I ended up with an A. Second one, the teacher went missing for 7 weeks and I got a B. No feedback on assignments = no motivation to do assignments, you know? We'll see how this semester goes, especially with 3 classes.
And, I really want my part time job at Bed, Bath and Beyond back. Not just for the discounts. Really, the $5 off $15 coupons they send out are better than the employee discount. The extra money was good too. But, having never worked in retail, I enjoyed the experience. Since it wasn't my full time job, I could take the daily weird happenings and just enjoy them. I also made some really good friends. It's totally different from my day job and a place where my brain was really only working at 50% capacity. Felt good to just do something physical after spending all day sitting at a computer, thinking. (Really, I don't think all day at work but hope you understand).
I also want to keep volunteering with Neighbor Ride. It has been an awesome experience and a humbling one. I complain a lot about our lack of finances and opportunities to do things we'd like to do. But, after you've talked with somebody who has to chose between groceries for the week or seizure medication for their daughter, my situation didn't seem that bad. It also feels really good to be able to do something as small as giving somebody a ride to their church but know that that small action makes a huge difference in their lives.
I also need to get my exercise routine jumping. I was going 2-3 times a week before the Christmas holidays. Then, we were getting ready for the cruise, then we went on the cruise and this week I am sick. Result: haven't gone to the gym in a month. I have lost about 65% of my excess body weight, which has culminated in some loosey goosey skin around the tummy and hips (awesome mental picture, ain't it?). The doctor has talked about going in and fixing that but he doesn't want to do it till I have reached the 70% excess body weight loss since that's the number most people keep off for the rest of their lives. I am still losing weight, but at the rate of 1/2-1 lb a month. If I want to reach my goal, I need to ramp that up to 5 lbs a month. Which means I might need to start running. Like walking very fast, like both feet off the ground at the same time, like sweating and heart rate up and body fat melting (mmm another awesome mental image).
I also would like time with my husband, dog and sister and not go days without seeing or eating a meal with them. Don't really have to explain that one, do I?
Now, if you read all that and are asking yourself if my particular world has more than 24 hours in a day, don't worry. That's the same question I've asked myself. I do thrive when things are hectic and my plate's more than just full. I got the best grades in school when I was taking classes at both a community college and a state university and working at both places too. But, I wasn't married. So much to do, so little time. I wish there were some things I could do while sleeping - showering, eating breakfast, getting ready for work etc. Sleeping, I feel, is a giant waste of time, so if I could at least multi-task while sleeping, it would make things easier. Or, if we could come up with a rejuvenation pod where you cna take a power nap for an hour or so and get out feeling like you had a 6-8 hr sleep, now that would be a worthwhile invention.
Since I can do neither of those, I have to look at everything I WANT to do, figure out what I NEED to do and cut out some things from my schedule. Sucky.
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Thankfulness and Resolutions
I know I am a little late for the usual Thanks stuff but the start of a whole new year makes one reflective and I figured why do the usual resolutions that break within the first month anyways?
So, here are a few things I am very thankful for:
1) Jeff: It's been 5 years since I met, 3 years since we got married and 2 years since we ghot married again ;-)। Some days it feels like I have known him forever; other times, I feel like we met so late in life that it's not enough time together. Either way though, I couldn't imagine life with anybody else. He's a calming force in my whirlwind life. Anyone who knows me closely knows that I am at my best when I have multiple things going and maybe even when there's a crisis looming on the horizon. I am sure if that's how I lived my life all the time, I'd crash and burn soon. But, Jeff's always there to slow me down, make me relax and just enjoy life.
2) Suheir: My sister moved in with us earlier this year and I wasn't sure how that would work out। I felt a little trepidation; understandable since we hadn't lived together in 11 years. We've had our tiffs, she's the younger one so she reserves the right to be a pain in the butt and I reserve the right as older sister to be the know it all :-). However, it's been really good to have her here. She's known me the longest next to my parents, she's heard all my secrets and she's still my biggest supporter. I couldn't ask for a better younger sister.
3) My parents: All I have to say is they seem to have forgotten anything I did to make them tear their hair out in my younger days। They will always be in my corner, applauding my successes and sharing in my losses. I love and miss my parents.
4) My in-laws: What a word "in-law" is. I don't know how it is in other cultures by Bollywood has perpetuated this image of an in-law that makes us cringe at that word. I am very happy to say that my in-laws are nowheer near those images। I got lucky in that area. I have the most loving and caring in-laws: parents who care about us and have even taken my sister under their wings. I have also gained 2 sisters who share embarrassing stories about Jeff from his childhood. And their husbands couldn't be nicer. So, all in all, I might have picked the best in-laws in the whole entire world.
5) Friends: I have moved around so much I am surprised I have any friends. But, it says something about their tenacity that they've stuck with me through all my adventures and misadventures. I thank all of you for being my pillars and my crying shoulders. I thank you for coming over sick in the rain to help put lights up. I thank you for letting me call you in the middle of the night and complain about anything. I thank you for spending hours in the aisles of DSW helping me find the perfect shoe। I thank you for going to Indian restaurants when you don't even like the food.
6) Co-workers: For my first job, I sure did get lucky। I have a boss who's also a friend. Our puppies are in love with each other. I have coworkers I can tolerate on weekends too.
7) Smokey: How could I forget him? I never thought an animal could invoke the feelings of love that Smokey does. And the love he gives back; it's unconditional and completely trusting. He is the bestest puppy in the whole entire world (as we tell him again and again).
My 1 resolution for the new year would apply to everyone named above: try and be more patient. I am impatient with a hair trigger temper. It does come down as fast as it goes up. But, i resolve to work on being a little more patient with all the people who matter and to stop and smell the roses (cliche but true) every now and then.
So, here are a few things I am very thankful for:
1) Jeff: It's been 5 years since I met, 3 years since we got married and 2 years since we ghot married again ;-)। Some days it feels like I have known him forever; other times, I feel like we met so late in life that it's not enough time together. Either way though, I couldn't imagine life with anybody else. He's a calming force in my whirlwind life. Anyone who knows me closely knows that I am at my best when I have multiple things going and maybe even when there's a crisis looming on the horizon. I am sure if that's how I lived my life all the time, I'd crash and burn soon. But, Jeff's always there to slow me down, make me relax and just enjoy life.
2) Suheir: My sister moved in with us earlier this year and I wasn't sure how that would work out। I felt a little trepidation; understandable since we hadn't lived together in 11 years. We've had our tiffs, she's the younger one so she reserves the right to be a pain in the butt and I reserve the right as older sister to be the know it all :-). However, it's been really good to have her here. She's known me the longest next to my parents, she's heard all my secrets and she's still my biggest supporter. I couldn't ask for a better younger sister.
3) My parents: All I have to say is they seem to have forgotten anything I did to make them tear their hair out in my younger days। They will always be in my corner, applauding my successes and sharing in my losses. I love and miss my parents.
4) My in-laws: What a word "in-law" is. I don't know how it is in other cultures by Bollywood has perpetuated this image of an in-law that makes us cringe at that word. I am very happy to say that my in-laws are nowheer near those images। I got lucky in that area. I have the most loving and caring in-laws: parents who care about us and have even taken my sister under their wings. I have also gained 2 sisters who share embarrassing stories about Jeff from his childhood. And their husbands couldn't be nicer. So, all in all, I might have picked the best in-laws in the whole entire world.
5) Friends: I have moved around so much I am surprised I have any friends. But, it says something about their tenacity that they've stuck with me through all my adventures and misadventures. I thank all of you for being my pillars and my crying shoulders. I thank you for coming over sick in the rain to help put lights up. I thank you for letting me call you in the middle of the night and complain about anything. I thank you for spending hours in the aisles of DSW helping me find the perfect shoe। I thank you for going to Indian restaurants when you don't even like the food.
6) Co-workers: For my first job, I sure did get lucky। I have a boss who's also a friend. Our puppies are in love with each other. I have coworkers I can tolerate on weekends too.
7) Smokey: How could I forget him? I never thought an animal could invoke the feelings of love that Smokey does. And the love he gives back; it's unconditional and completely trusting. He is the bestest puppy in the whole entire world (as we tell him again and again).
My 1 resolution for the new year would apply to everyone named above: try and be more patient. I am impatient with a hair trigger temper. It does come down as fast as it goes up. But, i resolve to work on being a little more patient with all the people who matter and to stop and smell the roses (cliche but true) every now and then.
With that, I wish you all a happy ending to 2008 and a wonderful beginning to 2009।
सब को २००९ की शुभ कामनाएं!
Monday, December 22, 2008
New Green Card
Got my renewed Green Card. Now, I am legal here for the next 10 years, yay!
Also, big difference in photo:
Also, big difference in photo:
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