Wednesday, May 08, 2013

Advice to any parent

Just read this and apply whichever criticism applies to your decisions. Because no matter what, somebody out there will find some way to undermine your decision and tell you how you'll forever scar your kid's psyche.

You want a natural childbirth? Freaking hippies. Want the epidural? Well obviously you're not woman enough.

You decide to breastfeed longer than a year? What a martyr. You have to formula supplement or feed? What a giver upper.
You decide to stay at home? Lazyass. You decide to go back to work? You don't love your child.

You decide to let the baby sleep with you? You murderous non-caring parent. You make the child sleep on their own? You are obviously too cold to be a good parent.


You decide to soothe the baby by carrying him and rocking him? You are going to spoil that child, you'll be carrying him to college. You let the baby cry it out? Holy cow you must not have a heart.

You let the child feed themselves as soon as they can hold food? You must be trying to choke your own child. You feed the child for as long as possible yourself? You must be a control freak.

You never leave the baby to go out alone or with each other? Your marriage must be suffering. You go out to dinner leaving the child with family or a caregiver? You are a horrid parent.

I haven't even covered a small percentage of what you'll be judged on. I could go on and on. Every little decision you make will have somebody rolling their eyes. So my ONLY advice to you is take everything with a grain of salt and go with your gut. Don't let others get you to doubt your decisions.

Parenting is so hard. It is the hardest thing I've ever done. I think it was harder being that I was 35 when I had Oli. Less energy, less patience, less flexibility. But, when his face lights up as soon as he sees us and he runs to us yelling mom and dad, those sleepless nights and those seemingly unending tantrums are so forgotten. When his little arms hug me around my neck and he kisses me, I don't doubt a single decision we've made regarding him.

We as parents need to bond together and support each other emotionally, heaven knows we need it. Leave the judgment at the door and ask a new parent how you can help.

And hey new parent? When somebody asks you that, seriously, tell them. Ask them to hold the baby so you can shower. So, you can nap. Ask them to pick up groceries for you. To make freezer meals for your recovery period. Ask them to pick you up a disgustingly high in calories meal from McDonalds because that's the only thing your brain wants. Ask them to come sit with you and hand you tissues as you cry on your couch without even knowing why you are crying. Ask who keeps late or early hours, so you know who you can call at what time. Don't be afraid to ask!

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