Friday, December 16, 2016

Being untrue to myself

This is fear. This is trepidation for my child. This is what the current political climate made me do tonight.

What is this?

This is me taking a permanent black Sharpie and coloring in pink lines on sneakers. We bought these on clearance at Columbia in CA last year. When we got back here, I saw the color and so did Oliver, and he loved them.

Tonight, he asked if he could wear them tomorrow. Of course he can!!! But, then I started thinking of the hatred that has gained voice and volume since the election results came out. And, I wanted to protect my 6 year old. I wanted to keep him from the ugliness of the world around him that's reared its head in the past few weeks. So, I took a black marker and colored in everything pink on the outside. And, I cried inside the entire time. Because, I'm doing what I've fought against his entire life. Boys can wear pink if they want. Boys can wear dresses if they want. Boys and girls can do whatever each of them want.

And, today, out of fear for my son's innocence, I did something that goes against everything I believe in. And, that kills a little piece of me inside.

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