Things we've handed down

A song from my baby shower CD that's making me cry as I listen to it:

Things We've Handed Down - Marc Cohn

Don't know much about you
Don't know who you are
We've been doin' fine without
But we could only go so far
Don't know why you chose us
Were you watching from above
Is there someone there that knows us
Said we'd give you all our love.

Will you laugh just like your mother
Will you sigh like your old man
Will some things skip a generation
Like I've heard they often can.

Are you a poet or a dancer
A devil or a clown
Or a strange new combination of
The things we've handed down.

I wonder who you'll look like
Will your hair fall down and curl
Will you be a Mama's boy
Or Daddy's little girl
Will you be a sad reminder
Of what's been lost along the way
Maybe you can help me find her
In the things you do and say

And these things that we have given you
They are not so easily found
Oh, but you can thank us later for
The things we've handed down
The things we've handed down
down,down,down,down,down

You may not always be so grateful
For the way that you were made
Maybe some feature of your father's
That you'd gladly sell or trade
And one day you may look at us
And say that you were cursed
But over time that line has been
Extremely well rehearsed.

By our fathers and their fathers
In some old and distant town
From places no one here remembers
come

The things we've handed down
The things we've handed down, down
The things we've handed down

 Last night, Jeff and I were watching our taped Dancing With The Stars show from Monday night, and I picked up Oli and started doing the jive while holding him. He chuckled, he giggled, he laughed out loud while holding on to me hard. I told Jeff I hope he gets my love for music and dance and my mom's talent for learning dance. I don't him to ever be self conscious of himself and I want him to know how to dance. And, it got me thinking. When I was pregnant, we would wonder who he'd look like. We analyzed the ultrasound photos; family proclaimed his mouth looked exactly like Jeff's.

Now that he's here, every expression he makes, every feature he has, we try to figure out who he got it from. Sometimes it's me or Jeff, sometimes it's a grandparent, maybe even an aunt. He has this habit of putting his index finger right on the tip of his lips as he looks at something new or is thinking, that's exactly like what my sister does. When he's frustrated, he gets a slight vein showing down the middle of the forehead. I have that too. His hair curls all over the place, like mine and Jeff's did. When he's sleeping, he tucks his lower lip under his upper lip and sometimes grinds his teeth. totally Jeff!


I hope he gets the love of history from his dad, the love of science from his aunts, grandma and grandfathers, the love of dance & music from his other grandma ... I hope he doesn't get my short temper, his dad's resistance to change and other things I won't mention here for fear of offending other family members ;-). I hope he retains the playfulness he has now and never loses the ability to laugh.

I also know at some point in his life, he'll tell us he wishes he was adopted and then some 5-10 years later, he'll tell us how much he's grateful for everything we've done for him (I am just basing this on our own experiences). However he's feeling at whatever time, I hope that his dad and I and the rest of his family instills in him all the things needed to be happy, content and successful in his life. So that in the end, he's glad for the "things we've handed down" to him.